By Sr Teresa Hayward (RN, RM, Lactation consultant, Infant & Paediatric Nutritionist, Baby Sleep Consultant)
BABIES FUNCTION THE SAME AS US
Babies are tiny, little; immature human beings and we should start looking at them as such and not as aliens with their own set of rules.
Babies communicate, eat, sleep, wee and poo and suffer from different ailments exactly the same as all humans do.
If parents compare their babies to themselves, they will begin to understand their baby’s a lot more and it will help them in caring for their babies.
COMMUNICATION
We all communicate out feeling in certain ways. When we are sad, we cry, when we are angry we yell or scream or take it out on the person closest to us. We talk to each. Babies can’t do this yet, so they cry when they are sad, bored, lonely, overtired, over stimulated, too hot or too cold, have a dirty nappy, a label is irritating them in their clothes, or the material of the new babygro is itchy or scratchy, when they have discomfort or pain, or when they are hungry. This is their way of saying “mommy, give me some attention”. It is not a sign of naughtiness, as babies can’t be naughty. As the adult parent, it is our job to find out which it is. Don’t go straight for food or medication! Try and find out what your little human is trying to communicate with you
EATING
I see all the time where moms go for the food option first and feed their baby, when in actual fact they aren’t hungry. If a baby is taught from the beginning that my eyes are open, I must eat, that is what will happen, they open their eyes and want to eat.
Yes, we demand feed our breastfed babies, but we don’t demand feed out bottle fed babies. The reason this is the breast is also used a comfort at times and a baby may have had a small feed at the last feed and is hungry 2 hrs later. We are not controlling the volume going into a breast fed baby, which we are with a formula fed baby
Remember here as well, babies are little humans. A baby will not only eat if hungry, the same as we don’t eat just because we are hungry. If we are bored, feeling lonely, stressed, or sad, most of us go for the food cupboard. If we are offered a slice of cake, we will still eat it, even though we aren’t hungry. Babies do the same. Offer them a breast or bottle and even if they aren’t hungry they will take it. Exactly like us, if we eat too much or too often, we gain weight. Babies do the same! If a baby is supposed to have 6 bottles a day of 120mls, and you give them 120mls whenever they cry, so they end up having 9 bottles, the volume in 24hrs is more than their tummy can hold and digest, so they will end up overfeeding, suffering with reflux, cramps, more poos, or constipation, feel uncomfortable and bloated and don’t sleep well. 120mls x 6 = 720mls in a 24hrs; 120mls x 9 = 1060mls in a 24hrs. That is a huge difference for a baby, especially when a baby should never be drinking more than 1000mls of formula in a 24hr period. If we eat 6 plates of food instead of 3 plates, we are going to become fat.
I use the example of Christmas day a lot. We all over eat on Christmas day, both in volume of food as well as type of food we eat. How do we feel at the end of it? This is how your baby feels is we are overfeeding them.
There is no such thing as a BIG FAT HEALTHY BABY! FAT AND HEALTHY should never be used in the same sentence. When we weigh our babies, we should not only be looking to see if they have gained enough, but that they haven’t gained too much.
SLEEPING
A baby is very sensitive to how long they can stay awake because their little bodies and brains are still so immature. Just 5min longer can send your baby into overtiredness and overstimulation. As soon as a baby is overtired or over stimulated, they will fight to go to sleep and will have short naps, due to the fact that their little brains cant switch off. This is exactly the same as adults. If you have been out late parting or working late, you will find you body will fight sleep when you climb into bed. Your brain will be un able to sleep and you will find that you will wake up often
Watch for your babies early sleep cues, I find often parents are watching for the late sleep cues. By the time they are showing late sleep cues, they are already overtired.
The importance of a sleep zone or environment is totally underestimated by parents. So often the cause of the sleep problem is that there is not a sleep zone. Imagine sleeping in the bathroom or bathing in the kitchen. It doesn’t work. It is the same for a baby. They will not sleep properly in different environments. We don’t sleep well on the couch or in a strange place either
Sleeping in different places prevents them going into the Deep cycle of sleep as there are different external stimuli in every environment. The same as if you fall asleep with the television on, you will be able to hear it in the background, meaning that you aren’t going into a deep sleep. You also wake up not feeling well rested.
Always be realistic about your babies sleep, and think about what you class as sleeping through. Remember none of us sleep right through the night; the difference is we don’t need our mom to help us get back to sleep. Something else to remember, a baby who is co sleeping or sleeping in the parents’ bedroom will rarely sleep through, especially after 4months. I am not saying it is wrong for them to sleep there, but parents need to realise this.
WEEING AND POOING
Babies wee and poo exactly the same as we do.
Generally the wees are not a problem, but parents are concerned about the poos.
The poo is either not the right colour, consistency, often enough or deviates from what he normally does.
It is normal for a baby to poo 7 times today, but only once tomorrow. It is also normal for them to go a couple of days without a poo. As adults, we don’t necessarily poo every day day, some days well poo 3 times, then go 3 days without a poo. We don’t automatically take a laxative to make ourselves poo, so don’t do this with your baby
Remember as well, pooing is one function that babies have to learn. They have to learn to tense their tummy muscles and relax their anal muscle at the same time. It is a bit of hit and miss to start with, but not a sign of constipation.
Babies do go red and strain their faces when they poo, but so do you. How many of us can say we don’t strain and push when we go poo.
A baby who is overfed and feeling really bloated will also push with a grunt. It is their way of trying to get rid of that uncomfortable feeling.
Be very careful of getting into the habit of laxatives. When a mom says to me, there is nothing wrong with it, they don’t become habit forming, I’ve been doing it twice a day since 3weeks and my baby is now 9months, and it the only way he will poo. Can you not see what is wrong with that sentence? No one should be on chronic laxatives.
If your baby is constipated, think for yourself, what do I do if I’m constipated? Do you go straight for a laxative, or do you try and eat something that will help you poo, or do you drink more water?
SUFFER FROM DIFFERENT AILMENTS
Some of the different ailments that babies suffer from in the first 3months are due to an immature gut and immature organs.
If your baby is struggling with reflux, cramps or constipation this is related to their feeds. This means that something in their diet is causing a problem and because they have an immature gut they are struggling with it. Remember, exactly like adults that get cramps, reflux (heartburn) or even constipation, it due to something in our diet or eating too much. This is the same with babies. Do we as adults go straight to the medication before making changes in our diet? Generally no. Change your baby’s diet first before medicating. There are times when medicating is necessary, but first try the diet. Our babies also have an immature liver and immune system, so by medicating them affects these. Medicating an ailment when the cause is still there is pointless.
Remember these gorgeous little babies are human too and your journey into parenthood will be so much easier
If you are struggling with any of the above issues don’t hesitate to contact me and I will help you understand your baby better and help you sort out any issues you have. You can contact me on 0824009501 or via facebook. A consult is R320
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