Co-sleeping - should your or shouldn't you?

By Sr Teresa Hayward (RN, RM, Lactation consultant, Infant & Paediatric Nutritionist, Baby Sleep Consultant)

Should you or shouldn’t you co-sleep? This is one of the biggest discussions amongst new parents.

The terms co-sleeping and bed-sharing are often used interchangeably, but they’re not exactly the same thing — and it’s crucial to know the difference.

Bed-sharing means sleeping in the same bed as your baby or sharing the same sleeping surface.

Co-sleeping means sleeping near your baby, sometimes in the same bed and sometimes nearby in the same room (room-sharing).

In other words, bed-sharing is one way of co-sleeping. But it’s not a healthy practice. Parents are warned against bed-sharing because it increases a baby’s risk for SIDS. Ultimately, there’s no such thing as safe bed-sharing, and you should never sleep in bed with your baby.

The safe way to co-sleep with your baby is to room share — where your baby sleeps in your bedroom, in her own co-sleeper, crib, bassinet or cot next to the bed. It is in fact recommended to co-sleep with your baby until she’s at least 6 months old, but this is a personal decision, an doesn’t work for all parents, and some parents may decide to co-sleep until baby is one year.

The benefits of co-sleeping

· There is evidence that babies who co-sleep breastfeed for longer than babies who don’t

· Babies who co-sleep have better immunity

· It is convenient for mom

· Babies who share sleep spaces with their parents experience emotional benefits such as security, emotional stability and are more likely to be well adjusted

The risks of co-sleeping

· Co-sleeping is recognized as a risk factor for cot death – a lot of this has to do with the parent’s state whilst sleep – falling asleep on a sofa with baby is seen as extremely dangerous, parents have consumed even one glass of wine or taken painkillers should not co-sleep with their baby as suffocation is much more likely

Co-sleeping safety

If you are co-sleeping, you can do so safely and be confident in deciding to do so, if you take the following into consideration

· Your baby must be on their back

· Do not have a pillow near your baby

· Do not cover your baby with your duvet, or use an electric blanket or hot water bottle

· Place your baby on the outside of the bed, and never between you and your partner

· Make sure your baby won’t fall out of bed or get trapped between mattress and wall

· Have a sleep nest or co-sleeper that creates a space for your baby in or next to your bed

· Do not co-sleep if you or your partner smoke during the day

· Do not drink any alcohol or take any form of medication before bedtime

· Keep pets away from the bed and don’t have other children sharing the bed

· Follow all other safe sleep advise to reduce risk of SIDS

· Do not co-sleep if your baby was born prematurely or very small – before 37wks or weighs less than 2.5kg

Can you sleep coach while you are still co-sleeping

When your baby is a newborn, they are waking frequently through the night for feeds, but once the reach 4-6months, they are waking more out of habit, and not because they need to. It is recommended that baby co-sleep until 6months, but if this is not working for you, you will need to reassess. Sleep coaching is aiming to help parents to get their babies to sleep better, so that baby gets more sleep. Sleep coaching with a baby in the same room can be a challenge but it is possible.

· Move your baby away from the bed so that you cant see each other

· Add some white noise to the room

· Stay consistent

· If you are still struggling, consult a baby sleep consultant

When should you stop room-sharing?

It is recommended to co-sleep until your baby is 6months old, but it comes down to what feels right for your family and what works for you. If you want to more your baby into their room, earlier or later than 6months that is fine too

Research and experience have taught me that both babies and parents tend to sleep worse when sharing a room after 4months. Also, co-sleeping seems to increase the odds that an older baby will end up in her parents bed at some point during the night, which isn’t safe, an can lead to bad sleeping habits developing.

Though the subject of co-sleeping can be confusing and even controversial, the most important thing to remember is that co-sleeping is safe and recommended to reduce SIDS risk during infancy, while bed-sharing can be dangerous and raises SIDS risk. It has to be something that works for you. Not everyone wants to co-sleep, and this is fine too.

For more information, contact Sr Teresa at 0824009501